Nov 252009

by Darryl L. Mobley

When was the last time you enjoyed a night out with your mate? I mean a date that did not include the kids, random friends, or unnecessary family members? If this kind of alone-time is a distant memory to you — then your relationship needs some new energy. Some sizzle. love-board300x200Some snap. Okay – even some sex for those of you who are so inclined. (You know who you are!)

Here’s the deal — If you don’t re-energize your relationship, your relationship will wither up and die. And you will despair as your once tight connection to your spouse becomes one in which you are – as the great, late Richard Pryor said in a comedy riff – “in love with a person you can’t stand!” Oh yes – it can happen to you.

The 4 tips that follow will help you keep your marriage fresh and alive:

(1) Praise and compliment one another regularly. Everyone needs encouragement, and when people are praised, they’re motivated to do even greater things. Research has shown that people tend to live up–or down–to our expectations. Learn to see each other more positively.

(2) Plan your future together. What do each of you want from the future? What are your hopes and dreams for your relationship? What are your hopes and dreams as individuals? Make plans to make these dreams a reality?

(3) Laugh. A healthy relationship is fun and funny. Reflect on a time when your relationship was fresh and new. What was different? Recapture that feeling.

(4) Make a date schedule and stick to it. A date with your mate should be as important to both of you as any business meeting. Take turns planning dates, and include things both of you enjoy.

You only get out of your marriage what you put into it. When a marriage has no goals, no shared activities, and no energy — it becomes boring and likely to disassemble.

Take your marriage to a better place — starting right now.

© 2008 Darryl L. Mobley

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